just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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