med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
