I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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