why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
