I wannas sexs uuuuu
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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