Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
birth control should be required to get into college
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
