New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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