I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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