I want to have your abortion
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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