No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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