just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
