Don't you send me to vm
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
