ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize