At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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