If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
