we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Im part way to drunk.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
