Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My pussy is not your playground.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Randomize
