I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
