that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
