well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Randomize
