i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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