well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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