Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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