i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
