My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize