that's an acceptable place to lick
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
She tied me up with her honor cords...
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize