I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
