so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
well you can't waste a boner
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
