Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
