we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
