so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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