its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
