we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
How external is "for external use only"?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
