is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
