I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
