I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Randomize
