I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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