I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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