Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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