Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
