I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
