btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
