The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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