idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
