I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
