do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I will be naked everywhere
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
