Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize