i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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