My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
