How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
